Tuesday, February 21, 2012


I got to visit my newest niece over the weekend. In some ways it broke my heart, I know I will never be close to her. I think mostly because I will probably never have another child of my own. Of course I know I already have five kids, but I had held out hope for one more. Maybe I am jumping ahead too much. My PAP came back with some not so awesome news. It explains why for some time I have been tired and having some pains. Until further testing there are no definite answers. I am sure some in my family will be elated to know I may not be able to birth any more children.
I am feeling a bit depressed lately. After the doctors and a few other things....it seems I can not get my head on right. Seems like nobody can really. Prayer has been coming from my soul to God a lot lately. Even during the most mundane tasks like vacuuming and picking up toys. I feel badly that I have not been doing my share. While I know Jimmy is not mentally ready to go back to his line of work, this is making him feel he should. Ugh, I feel like I am just complaining. Enough out of me.

1 comment:

  1. Don't ever feel like you are complaining.If something is weighing heavily on you, our instinct is to unload that weight the best way we know how. Your way is writing. Its a gift you have so of course you are going to use it. Don't ever be afraid to write how you feel. You may not only help yourself but help others in return :)