Saturday, May 18, 2013
When I was much younger, I never thought about 37. I never thought far ahead. It wasn't until more people my age started passing away or getting really sick. So here I am thinking about death. Not really my death, but Jimmys. My fear, thanks to statistics, is that he will pass first. I have a couple kid who this will put over the edge. Not that all of them won't have a hard time...there are just a couple who are fragile in general.
37 also has been thinking about my health. I am fairly healthy. But, I know with age and weight certain things can creep up. So I am hoping to get more active and more fit. I have a son who wants to join in with me on that. He rocks.
I am hoping during this next year I start and finish a certain project I have been talking about. I will get back to wear I want to be fashion wise, that's part of my artistic expression. I hope in the next year I grow closer with my kids. I hope I grow closer with my husband.
Friday, May 17, 2013
There is a lot going on in my life that if I allow, will take me into the pits of despair. It's not even anything that should. But, I let things get to me, I make it personal. I should stop it, bit I can not.
For the record it's not anything with anyone in my house.
When I get in these moods, I sometimes have to watch a YouTube video of Ben Haggerty in his lovely jumpsuit thrusting is pelvis. Sometimes I will watch him dance on his ass with Batman pajamas. Sometimes I look at his Instagram. I love his style and on my birthday...my 37th birthday....I thought it would be fun if he would go to my favorite thrift shop with me. I was bordering on crazy.
I know why I think he is the bees knees....He reminds me of my husband. The blue eyes, the profile (before his pregnancy weight)....and how my husband used to dress with some style. Then there is they way he says "Fuck"....cracks me up. No, I am not some cray cray middle aged woman who will seek him out and try to steal his bolo tie. I am a middle aged woman with six kids, who need a break from the chaos of other adults from time to time.
For now I leave you with this....