Saturday, March 31, 2012

'Emotional Crafting" or Painting

I have been "emotional crafting"....well, that is what I call my paintings. I use acrylic craft paints. Ever since I have been doing this, I feel a myriad of emotions and I feel it is seen in my work. Since I first started painting way back when I was 14 at Banning High School, I have enjoyed painting the female form. This is one of a few I have recently done. They are just representations and all the colors used are a representation of all the colors we as women are.

"Maggie Mindstorm"

I was sitting at the table a hour or so ago, the gesso had just dried on my canvas. Thursday I was lucky enough to find some vintage canvas' at a thrift shop and swooped them up. I pulled out some colors and was set on painting something different. During the first few paint strokes my Maggie began having a very emotional anxiety attack and wanted daddy. He was trying to help her breathe through it. She cried "Why can't I just stopped having anxiety?" She began to yell and cry. Sometimes when she has these attacks you can also get snippets of the ups and downs of her possible bipolar disorder. Ugly things fly from her mouth weaved in with worrisome cries. I painted as I felt her emotions.
For a seven year old little girl she deals with a lot emotionally, physically and mentally. She has these mindstorms some weeks, daily other weeks they are few and far between. Her meds do help but, without completely sedating her, there has been no way to keep them at a low level. I am hoping to get her some alternative therapies, she has always loved horses and I think that would be great therapy for her. She identifies with wolves and their howls, I am saving up for a membership to the California Wolf Center. Also, I am working on making her an artists box...looking for a perfect box to paint for her. She is so tangled up in herself.
Okay, I am stopping for now.


Sunday, March 25, 2012

Kids Music: Woody Guthrie

We all know, or should know who Woody Guthrie was. His folk music was more than political, he also did music geared towards children. The who album's above can be found on Amazon, and Pandora has a station. Our little unschooling family found this years ago via Zune. remember Zune?
Ever since our ears fell upon these recordings we like to sing "Wake up" and "My yellow Crayon". They are calming, fun and make me want to blow bubbles. Of course the kids love the album's especially on a rainy day like today.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Being Elmo: A Puppeteer's Journey (Review)

Quite by accident earlier this week Netflix recommended this documentary to me. I guess Netflix know this momma loves a good inspiring documentary.
Being Elmo is a look into the journey Kevin Clash had to become what he is now. He had a passion, a vision and a dream that his parents encouraged. When he speaks about certain aspects of his journey you can still see his shyness, when he speaks about great moments in his journey, such as when he first met Kermit Love then met Jim Henson you can see his eyes light up.
The interviews with his family are heartwarming and even a bit funny when his sisters tell stories.
I recommended this documentary for people of all ages, stages of life and educational backgrounds. It's never to early....or too late to follow a dream or have passion for something. It's also never to late to support your children in their dreams. You never know where it will lead you or them.


Tuesday, March 6, 2012

BiPolar Disorder and Addiction

I talked to someone not too long ago and was told that many doctors (including the founder of Jimmy's treatment center) believe BiPolar disorder go hand in hand. Alcoholism in fact tends to be more common with those who suffer from mania more than depression while those with the more depressive sides of this abuse methamphetamine. Then there are those who sway back and forth equally who tend to abuse both.

For people like my husband, more manic, the alcohol at first helps them maintain a level of "normalcy". They seem to function better and for him, he was more social. He was for most of the time functioning. He never lost his job, got a DUI or called in sick to work. Looking back I could see that during the times he drank less he was more manic, spending and antsy. Sometimes he would get depressed and sneak my pain meds for my gall bladder. At one point I made a comment I thought he was BiPolar like his mother. He said I was, and maybe I am.

In my heart of hearts I knew in some way addiction and mood disorders kind of danced with each other. One would serenade the other and do some sort of tango. I never really looked into it because, I am just a mom, a wife with lost of ideas and no real resources for them. It wasn't until I realized my daughter is BiPolar and my oldest son showed the same tendencies I looked more into it. It makes sense looking at the people in my life who have suffered from the brutal disease of addiction who try to maintain a "normal" mood, or life. My thought it there is only "normal" for you. The insanity of addiction and BiPolar disorder together is a nasty mix. When you can work on the addiction and see the insanity of your moods and work on that, life is much more manageable. That's not to say you won't have episodes where the insanity is more apparent.

I hope this has helped someone besides myself.

Much Love.