Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Magic Mike and Standards

Through an online friend (who is pretty amazing) I ran across a blog post that has me thinking. Thinking about the standards some women hold their men up to, in the name of righteousness. In the blog post she had a picture of John Wayne. She says he is handsome and had dignity. Lady, do your research. John Wayne was married three times and had several PUBLIC affairs.

Nobody is perfect and even in the Bible it states we all fall short. That lovely and I am sure well meaning array of photos, it's dangerous. To hold the men in your life to standards they may unfitting or to put them on a throne they may fall from, could slap you in the face. You have no idea what has, is or will go through these mens minds. Of course it's more unintentional then not when they look and see some lady with a tight shirt and think "Damn I wish her bra wasn't padded." or even see some lady with her grey sweats folded down and think her butt look like it needs to be smacked. These things happen.

With older people, you don't know their whole stories, just the ones they share. Really, with anyone. I know there are many people who don't know that when Jimmy and I met her was married. Jimmy also GASP! had a child. That does not make either one of us bad people, it makes us HUMAN! Here we are all these years later with our sixth kid on the way. We have healthy sexual lives and a healthy fantasies. Granted most of our fantasies will never come to fruition (sigh oh Benjamin Bratt circa Blood In Blood Out). We are open enough to share these things and learn. We can even laugh, yes laugh about sex because it's normal. Bibilcally speaking, read Song of Solomon and get some moves.

Now on to your "a good man list" is mine.

A Good Man Will

  • tell you when you're being judgmental.
  • when you're being mental...from a distance.
  • have his own thoughts and feelings.
  • tell you when your armpits or breathe smell (or any other body part).
  • tell you he wishes you would of made dinner since he worked in 110* weather.
  • forgive you when your heart has wandered.
  • tell his and your parents that they are being nuts.
  • get sober for his benefit not YOURS.
  • read books he likes, not the ones you do.
  • use your deodorant and tooth brush in a crisis.
  • look at other women and laugh when you catch them.
  • admits he has faults and well as admit you do.
  • love you when you're crazy, even when you know you are and deny it.
  • call you on your bull shit and let you call you on his.
  • be honest, be real and make his own standards.
Yeah, my husband is a real man. A real man with real flaws, real feelings, real ideas and a real crazy wife.


  1. yes yes yes yes yes. i couldn't have said it any better myself.

  2. I would say, a real man will be utterly and completely himself and do his best to live for God's glory and just like everyone else, fall short sometimes. A real man will do his best to fix it when he does and get back up. Every man is different just like every woman is different and I too hate real the fake stuff, the hiding the dirt under the rug, in closets, and behind doors. So yeah, a real man will be "real".

  3. Give me a real, down-to-earth man over a "fake, perfect" one any day. That way I get to be real and accepted for who I am, too! Thanks for this post - I love it!